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WRITER, CONSULTANT AND BROADCASTER SPECIALISING IN BEER, PUBS AND CIDER. BEER WRITER OF THE YEAR 2009 AND 2012

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Wednesday, 17 March 2010

Happy St Paddy's Day!

After having the naked audacity yesterday to suggest that a large regional brewer doing something that improves beer quality might actually be a Good Thing for beer drinkers, I’ve decided to completely blow any remaining credibility I might have with the miserable indie kid wing of the beer fraternity and write a post in praise of Guinness.

Beer Nut – I’m not necessarily calling you a miserable indie kid but I know how you feel on this particular issue. It might be best if you just look away now.

I like Guinness. Sorry, but I do.

I like it as a brand – it’s stuck to its guns with mould-breaking, innovative creative advertising for eighty years now – and I occasionally like it as a beer.

If there was a better porter or stout on the bar, of course I would choose to drink that instead.

But the point is, in 99 out of 100 pubs, there isn’t a better porter or stout on the bar. There’s no porter or stout at all. Apart from Guinness.

In fact when you think about it, the fact that Guinness – a dark, bitter stout – is as ubiquitous as it is in a world dominated by pale, tasteless imitation pilsners, it is a remarkable achievement.

You might be about to comment that Guinness has been dumbed down and isn’t a patch on what it used to be. I’m not in a position to disagree with you.

You might also be about to comment that Guinness isn’t a ‘real’ stout, that it’s way too bland or even that it actually tastes of nothing at all. There, I would have to disagree.

Guinness is a big brand, one of the few beers that can truly claim to have a global presence. And the main reason it’s not even bigger? Survey after survey shows that the vast majority of beer drinkers find it too bitter, too challenging, too full-bodied. If Guinness were to reformulate to something as robust as the craft-brewed porters we all know and love, it would kill the brand stone dead. It might not be challenging to you, but it is to 99% of drinkers who ever come across it.

And still it survives. The success of Guinness should actually give us hop that there are enough people who like challenging beer to make brewing something a bit more challenging worthwhile.

If Guinness hadn’t kept the dark flame alive when porter and stout were otherwise extinct globally, would those styles have made the triumphant comeback that’s happened over the last ten years?

And there’s one other thing. It’s St Patrick’s Day. If you really, truly believe that Guinness is shit, then go to a pub in Galway tonight and tell the people drinking there that they have crap taste in beer and don’t know anything about drinking.

Good luck with that.

I’ll be in the Auld Shillelagh in Stokie tonight, having a few pints, otherwise I’d come with you and help try to find your teeth on the floor of the pub.

Guinness probably holds the world record (ironic that!) for number of books written about a single beer brand. Today there’s a new one out - Guinness ®: An Official Celebration of 250 Remarkable Year, from Octopus publishing. I don’t know if it’s any good or not, but it does have some recipes in it, and the publishers asked me if I'd put one up ande give the book a plug, so I am, because it's Paddy's day and I. Like. Guinness.

So here’s one for Iced Chocolate, Guinness and orange cake.

Slainte!

This sumptuous cake is perfect for a special occasion. The recipe may seem a little involved, but it’s easy to accomplish if tackled stage by stage.

Preparation time 45 minutes

Cooking time 1 hour

Serves 8

2 large oranges

250 g (8 oz) caster sugar

175 g (6 oz) unsalted butter, plus extra for greasing

150 g (5 oz) self-raising flour

25 g (1 oz) cocoa powder2 teaspoons baking powder

3 free-range eggs, beaten

25 g (1 oz) ground almonds

5 tablespoons draught Guinness

150 ml (¼ pint) double cream Icing

20 g (¾ oz) unsalted butter

50 g (2 oz) caster sugar

3 tablespoons draught Guinness

100 g (3½ oz) plain dark chocolate (70% cocoa solids), finely chopped

step 1 Peel one orange. Finely grate the zest of the other orange and set aside. Using a sharp knife, pare away the pith from both oranges. Cut the oranges into 5 mm (¼ inch) slices. Put them in a small saucepan and just cover with cold water. Bring to the boil, then reduce the heat and simmer for 10 minutes. Add 50 g (2 oz) of the sugar and continue to simmer until all the liquid has boiled away, watching carefully to ensure that the oranges don’t burn. Leave to cool.

step 2 Beat together the butter and the remaining sugar for the cake in a large bowl until very pale and fluffy. Sift together the flour, cocoa and baking powder, then beat into the butter mixture alternately with the eggs. Add the ground almonds, reserved grated orange zest and Guinness and beat for 3–4 minutes until you have a soft dropping consistency.

step 3 Grease and line the base and sides of 2 x 20 cm (8 inch) round cake tins, then divide the cake mixture equally between the tins, smoothing the surface. Bake the cakes in a preheated oven, 190°C (375°F), Gas Mark 5, for 25 minutes until risen and firm to the touch. Leave to cool in the tins for 5 minutes before carefully turning out on to a wire rack to cool completely.

step 4 Whip the cream in a bowl until soft peaks form, then spread over one of the cakes. Arrange the cooled orange pieces over the cream and carefully place the other cake on top.

step 5 To make the icing, put the butter, sugar and Guinness in a small saucepan. Stir over a gentle heat until the sugar has dissolved, then bring to the boil. Remove from the heat and add the chocolate. Leave to soften, then beat gently with a wooden spoon. Leave to cool and thicken. While still warm but not too runny, pour the icing over the cake and use the back of a spoon or a palette knife to spread it evenly.

16 comments:

Mario (Brewed for Thought) said...

Pete,

You're just perpetuating the myth that pub goers are violent people. Plus, they won't knock your teeth out, not with the new plastic pints at the pub ;)

Martyn Cornell said...

And it's still a fact that FES is one of the 10 finest beers in the world, for which I would forgive Guinness (almost) anything. Even Smithwicks …

Cooking Lager said...

Paddies Day = Green Lager, not black ale!

BLTP said...

I like guinness I have 3 pints every other week at film club in Gypsy hill and the guy takes his time serving it and sat next to open fire it's just great. I like the way it feels in my mouth and weird stuff the head does when you take sip.
It's great in chocolate cake too.
slainte!

Sid Boggle said...

How does one get the draught Guinness from the pub to the kitchen in order to create this epicurean delight?

Chris said...

The Beer Nut hasn't weighed in??? I doubt he is speechless...

Tandleman said...

And they'll mostly be drinking lager in Galway anyway.

Kelly Ryan said...

Great post, love it! Definitely agree that the success of Guinness has allowed dark ales to be more readily accepted in the marketplace. Always my fallback beer if nothing else worth drinking us on. Just don't be fooled into drinking a Guinness Cement Mixer... A pint with a shot if Baileys dropped in. Not to good...

Barry M said...

It's true, Guinness is a great cooking stout. :)

I guess it was the times that were in it, but I'm not so fond of Guinness mainly because of the part they played in the homogenisation of brewing and the closure fo so many breweries in Ireland. TBN wrote a short guest post about it here, and we mapped a lot of lost breweries of Ireland a year or more ago (I really must get my finger out on that).

However, yeah, I'm with Martyn on the FES, and right after I finish this lovely, Irish-owned, craft brewed O'Hara's Stout, I may pop down to my cellar for a Guinness Special Export which, in my humble opinion, is a notch above the FES. I do keep Extra Stout for cooking, though I prefer it to drinking Draught.

Ed said...

You didn't ignore the 'Dear blogger' email then: http://pencilandspoon.blogspot.com/

The Beer Nut said...

I shouldn't but...

Brand brand brand: not so much about the lactic-acid infused, hop-extract bittered, roast-barley-syruped, high-gravity-macrobrewed, smoothflow beer.

The lack of a better porter or stout in British pubs -- something I've bemoaned myself -- isn't a mark in favour of Guinness. Unless you want to give a shout-out to Carling because of all those British pubs with no better pilsner. A good St George's Day post right there.

Of course it would be the height of arrogance to go into a Galway pub and tell people that their Guinness is shit. I prefer to tell them about Aidan and Ronan: the two local guys who set up a brewery in a shed near the city and are making a pale ale -- the tap you can see on the bar next to the Guinness one. If you buy a pint of it, your beer money will go back into the Galway economy, not to an investor on the London stock exchange. Aidan and Ronan can't afford "mould-breaking, innovative creative advertising": that stuff's bloody expensive. But have a pint of it, and tell me if you think it's shit or not.

DJ said...

I like a good stout, thats why I don't drink this stuff.

Tom Fryer said...

Re BLTP's comment on 'the weird stuff the head does when you take a sip': I studied geology at uni before I joined the real world, and one of my tutors (who happened to be Irish) liked to use the head on a pint of the black stuff to demonstrate the concept of isostatic compensation related to thinning of the earth's crust. A bit unorthodox, but it clearly worked as I still remember it, uh, 20 years later.

Sorry. As you were.

TIW said...

Hmm. I don't mind the odd pint of GNS, I just can't be arsed waiting half an hour for that 'settling' cobblers which I'm sure has its origins in Guinness' marketing department. They certainly didn't bother with any of that when I used to drink with the auld lads in the Enkel Arms, Holloway.

The Beer Nut said...

Yep: pure marketing. Designed in the late '50s so drinkers who were used to the high-cask/low-cask method wouldn't complain so loudly that their beer was now kegged. It's all about the experience, dontcherknow.

Barm said...

I await the breathless post about the enhancement of the brand experience thanks to Heineken's barrel-shaped cans.